Wednesday I finished my finals and my buddy Nate came down to take me back home for spring break. We met up with Ashlee and headed to Victoria’s Midnight Café, which, for those of you who don’t know, is a coffee shop/bar that has open mic night on Wednesdays. Ashlee has been going there for a few years and she knows the owner and all the regulars. One of the regulars is Crazy Pete. Right off the bat you know that he’s going to be fun just from his name. Well Pete had a few drinks and was feeling pretty good. He stopped by the table to talk a bit but the conversation was a little one sided. He was talking about the things you do when you’re drunk. His story was something like this: “one thing you do when you’re drunk is make food.” He started. “This is never good because you’re drunk. You know you just start throwing stuff together, anything you’ve got and start cooking. So you end up with this mass of different kinds of food at different temperatures and you just start eating. Then next thing you know is you sick and asking why am I so sick?” this is where he starts talking to himself. “well because you’re drunk and you made drunk food and you ate your drunk food while you were drunk.” He then replies to himself, “oh… you’re right it think I’ll drink some water. Then you wake up and feel terrible so you drink some water and take five Tylenol, four Exsedrens and five heroine…” this he liked the idea of. “I don’t know if you can get heroine in fives but if you could I would. I would be Happy Heroine Pete and all the happy people would come and see Happy Heroine Pete!” He kept going and going like this with some interruptions of laughter from those of us who where at the table. All this time there was a guy who was taking advantage of the open mic. This guy, I think, was on some muscle relaxers and was moaning into the microphone passionately. It was one of the most painful things I’ve ever heard. Crazy Pete continued to talk. He said something about how you should make people think that you are crazy when you’re in jail so that you can get your own room. He also talked about the relationships that one has in jail… after he quoted some Shakespeare he jumped up on stage and grabbed his guitar and started playing with the people that were in the middle of their set. I’m pretty sure they didn’t know he was going to do that but he did. All and all is was a good way to close out the quarter.
